Monthly Archives: May 2006

Weekend Fun

 Hi folks,  just realised that apart from changing the old media player tilte, I haven’t wriiten anything for nearly 2 WEEKS!!
Doesn’t time fly when you are enjoying yourself!
"What news from the Dog Kennel ? " I hear you ask
Well … not too much really, which is one of the reasons  for the lack of bloggy activities. That and the lack of football have made jack a rather dull boy.
However due to the lack of interesting things occuring in the Kennel of life, Me and the old growler deciced to go to that London and visit my brother who has a pad down there.
We decided to drive down there and then park up at my  brothers house, and use public transport ( rail & bus )  to get around. A one day travel pass for both was about £5.10 which sound a bit steep, but when you find out that the bus ride is £ 1.50 flat fare you soon come out on top.
Corking weekend , did loads of touristy type things, Saturday went in to town visited Harrods,( nice store , but fuck off expensive ) ,looked at plasma tv’s and saw some bosters, walked FACKING MILES , and ended up in a place called Wagamamas, which is a noodle style establishment selling Japanese type nosh at very reasonable prices, ( apart from the beer which is a joke at £ 4.40 for a can of Sapporo which hasn’t even come from the land of the rising sun ). Very nice food, freshly cooked, and good sized  portions for the more greedy amongst us
Check it out at for  locations and menus etc. certainly worth a try, even if its just for something different. 
On the way back home,we went to a pub called the Puzzle, which serves San Miguel ( very nice ) , but was stacked out with South Africans all talking in quasi dutch africaans accents, (not so good) and had a live band which was very good.
After a heavy night on the pop,
Sunday mornig dawned at about 11.00am and we sullied forth to the Tower of London for some sightseeing. 
What a great place, queued for 1/2 an hour to get into the bloody tower, which wasn’t very bloody at all, looked at the Crown Jewels ( no jokes please ) and had a good stroll around the grounds drinking in the history that is contained within the walls of the castle.
On a seperate note, apparently they are not teaching this type of history in the schools.. why the fuck not!! its our history.. people come from all over the world to learn about OUR history, so why not teach it here!
Later  that night we went to a Tapas bar and had funnily enough …Tapas.. and more beer and wine. It was right about now that I realised that my hard fought weight loss success was about to go right down the pan. ( Actually some of it DID go down the pan, but thats another story)
Monday brought an earlier start, anf it was off to Greenwich, home of the Royal Observatory, and the Cutty Sark, for more walking and sight seeing.
Did you know that WE invented the way of measuring time at sea so that distance and position could be measured accurately?
Thats why we have Greenwich Mean Time. 
Then we had a look round Canary Wharf and ended up in a pub where we bought…. coffee!
What is the world coming to… coffee in pubs! they will be letting women and children in next!! ( only joking folks !) 
Because of the extremely inclement weather, thunder , lightning , hail and torrential rain,  we dedided to stay on a bit longer than anticipated and had more … coffee! what is the world coming to …….etc……
Due to our extended stay in the dry and warm hostelry drinking coffee we were late getting back , so decided to forgo the delights of the local kebab house ( remember that diet I was on) and have a healthy meal when we got back home. 
2 1/2 hours later me and Mrs. Dog were stood in the local chip shop engaging in the purchase of ….. Kebabs! It was my brothers fault m’lud , he put the idea into my mind!!
Anyway thanks to me Bro for a corking weekend, and we can’t wait until the next one.
I will add some photos when I get a chance to upload some if anybody is interested!

If If If ………..

Down these parts we have a saying… if shit was pudding , there would be no  starvation.
Well If Mr. Henry had put away those chances he had, then the loss of Lehman would n’t have mattered. However some of the refereeing left a lot to be desired.
Lets consider some of the more important decisions.
1: The sending off of Lehman.
By the letter of the law, a correct decision. Last man, denied a clear goal scoring opportunity… got to go.
What he could have done was let play carry on, see what happened, then react afterwards.
The more sensible approach would have been to let the goal stand, and book Lehman for a foul.
Ok, but then what happens if it goes to extra time and penalties, and Lehman saves the day?
2: Eto’o and the offside goal.
For season after season, Andy Gray and the Sky commentaters have been banging on about " clear distance " and "daylight " between the attacker and the last defender, and to give the attacker the benefit of the doubt.
That’s exactly what happened….. now the refs crap because he gave it! 
Make your mind up Mr. Gray please..
You can’t have it both ways. Just because its The Arsenal and EVERYBODY loves them. Yes most people in England wanted them to win, but it was exactly what you have been slagging refs off for all season..
3: Bookings
Now this is a different kettle of fish. On this one me and the illustrious Mr. G are in agreement. There were some really suspect decisions. Thierry Henry got booked for a perfectly good tackle,  Van Bommel should have been booked instead, Puyol and Marquez   were committing foul after foul and getting nothing. As Thierry said " if one of them picks up a yellow card, then it is a different game for them "  Some of the tackles were a joke, and certainly deserved cards, then its down t o10 men each, T.H. gets free and who knows?
Arsenal fans shouldn’t be too despondant. They had a right go, on another night some  of Thierrys chances would have gone in.. different ball game
Bad luck Arsenal.. At least you got there!! and didn’t disgrace yourselves either
If  if  if……
If shit was pudding , there would be no starvation!


" Merde Alors! what ze fook do I do now?
 Au cas où je rester ou devrais j’aller ? "
( should I stay or should I go? )
That’s how I should have done it!


   JUst a quick word to say
to Liverpool after a cracking game today in Cardiff.
A true classic in all senses of the word.
And to West Ham , bad luck boys but thanks to you too for a great game! 
                   3           3    
           cisse       32                             Carragher O.G.  21
           Gerrard   54                             Ashton              28
           Gerrard   91                             Konchesky         64
   6        –    4 after extra time and penalties.
     Penalties Scored
What a corker of a game. No review, it will be all over the TV anyway, but will go down as one of the best FA cup finals in recent history.
To Liverpool FC and their supporters, Well done.
To West Ham FC and their supporters, Well done as well , but bad luck, it happens that way sometimes. Don’t let it get you down, having been on the losing side with the Villa in 2000 it is pretty shit, but just remember the day, live the experience, it might be an awful long time before it comes round again. 
Man of the Match , Steven Gerrard 13.5.06

AParisian Adventure ( Part 3)

You wiil be happy to know that after much refliection I have realised that this Parisian Adventure is actually turning into Seadogs version of The Oddessy by Homer ( that a VERY famous greek literary figure, not Homer off the Simpsoms… Dooh ! ), only not quite so interesting, so I have decided to curtail the tales of foreign meanderings and just upload some photos instead. Hope you enjoy them

A Parisian Adventure (part 2)

,To continue..
The next morning (Sunday), after drinking a considerable amount of fairly respectable vino,(as already detailed earlier), I awoke with a mouth like Gandis slipper, a banging headache , and a very dry mouth.
After much deliberation, (well a few seconds ) we decided that we would go the flea market at Clignancourt, which apparently is fuck off huge, then go to the fair afterwards  ( which was also fuck off huge!), then see how the mood took us.
It didn’t take us very far as it was pissing down with rain and very very cold! Nevertheless , we had a PLAN, and by billyo gum we were going to stick to it.
So donning our newly purchased (the day before in a store called Tati for 5 euros each) cagooles, we sullied forth for some flea marketing bargaining.
When we arrived it wasn’t quite as big as we thought it would be, but we were there ( so we thought) and Mrs Dog had euros to burn.
Fortunateley for me and my soon to be pillaged pocket, apart from a natty handbag, there wasn’t really that much there.
It was about now that I started to wonder if in fact we were at the right flea market, as I have been to bigger car boot sales (and better).
English abroad.. huh!
The real market was just down the road and was facking ginormous!! It was almost like a suburb on its own, shops and stalls everywhere, a shoppers paradise.
Mrs. Dog started to frenzy, a frightening sight for all concerned!
Happily for the now deeply trousered euros in my pocket , because it was so cold ,we didn’t really run amok.
Then we got to the antiques area. Now there was some special stuff there, but again, the frenzy now having passed, we just had a look round.
After about an hour we decided to brave the local cafe scene and have some brekkie and a cup of coffee. Ouch. Croque monsieur x 2 (cheese on toast with ham),and 2 cups of cafe au lait was not far off 20euros. (thats about 14 quid!…facking hell!!)
Revitalised we then moved on to the fair, which was a ride on the metro away. At least that was warm and dry.
No fucker told me that Paris was in the midst of a rainstorm comparable to a tropical storm except it was bleeding cold! When we got off the metro  we nearly came back home because it was that bad!
Water Water everywhere.. and wet french people!
There was rain aplenty, so much so that the rides were pretty much empty, which ordinarilly would have been great, but due to the by now storm force 10 rain, meant that any serious attemp at fairground surfing  would have meant suicide by drowning.( besides which ,some of those rides were fuck off scary, and after a  skinfull of french vino, croque monsieur, and coffee, the last thing I wanted to do was barf it up all over some poor unfortunate gallic waif).
However Mrs. Dogs sweet tooth prevailed and we bought a sort of twizzle sweet which was made in front of our very own eyes. It was very very sweet, and the old growler really loved it.
When we could no longer take the rain and cold we thought "oh bollox, lets go back to Les Invalides, at least it will be dry", so that exactly what we did.
That is some serious place. It contains Napoleons tomb for a start off, plus loads of other fantastic statues, and pictures. We ended up stayinfg for much longer than we expected, so were late getting back to the hotel.
Being a good catholic boy, I had promised me poor old mum, that I would light a candle for her in Sacre Coeur or Notre Dame, and seeing as how we wanted to go and have some nosh in St. Germain du Pres, we thought Notre Dame would be a good bet, and we wolud see if Quasimodo was at home.
He wasn’t and it was shut when we got there about 9.00pm.
That meant a return journey on the morrow, so callling a day on our eclesiastical travels, we headed of to St Germain for a nose bag.
Only we didn’t. 
Mr. I know my way around Paris, got completely lost and we ended up back in Pigalle at about 11.30pm.
Mrs. Dog was almost fainting from lack of Winalot, I was completely fucked off because the night was spolt and we ended up in a very nice eatery that let us in at 11.45pm!
I have never eaten a 3 course meal with wine and coffee, so bleeding quick!
But it was nice, warm and quite filling so Mrs. Dog was once again a happy bunny, though exhausted.
Peace and harmony was restored at Dog Towers.  
Time to call it a night, so once again with an unerring sense of direction we walked around for 1hr to get back to the hotel, which was in fact only 5 mins walk away!
Twat…me that is.   
Time to call it a night, so thats what we did, amongst other things
At least the bed was comfy that night

A Parisian Adventure (part 1)

us Olde Dogs had quite a nice weekend in Paris, thanks for asking.
A fuck early start    ( I had to get up a 4.00AM!!!) then a nice trip  to Birmingham airport, where we caught an Air France plane to that Paris.
20 mins delay ( coz its a french plane flying from brum so gets second choice for a take off spot), then arriving at Charles de Gaulle Airport, which I have to say, even after a few visits, is quite an impressive place.
Thats when the fun started.
We got down to train station to buy a Paris Visite rail ticket, (unlimited travel on Metro, Bus and train for 3 days), to find the biggest fucking queue we have ever been in.
And its full of foreigners.(thats the problem with these international affairs.  too many foreigners!), most of whom were spanish.
Anyway, FINALLY we got on the train, to find that bastard was cancelled due to "an incident on the line" , and that we would have to get on a bus to go to the next station.
So donning my best french accent, and a  false frenchmans beard, we sullied forth to ask a guard where do we get the fucking bus from and where to.
It must have been the beard, because the helpfull lying bastard told us the wrong information, and 40 minutes later , we ended up right where started from!
Cue much blowing of top and starting to loose ones fucking rag!!
We eventually got on the train, then in to the hotel ,which was  in a place called Pigalle. Very interesting place, the parisian equivilant of soho.
Checked in , then off to the Henri Cartier Bresson museum by Montparnasse, where we viewed some very interesting photos by a bloke call Joan Colom ( he is a bloke really) whose forte was taking pictures of life in the barrio (homeboy) in Barcelona, which mainly consisted of many pics of spanish prossies and their arses or tits, with the occasional pic of some swarthy  looking bystander.
Seriously though, they were good pics , taken in black and white, from the 50’s.
We had a good look aroud Les Iinvalides, where Napoleons tomb is, and decided to come back on the sunday for  a proper look when we had more time.
We then sojourned back to the hotel for a rest and a drink, a quite passeble bottle of french white wine , from the local vintners for the pricely sum of 5 euros, (and he even opened it for us as well!)
Then we walked up to Monmartre for a very nice dinner at a chic eaterie called Chez Eugene, where we had the 26 euro set meal,(lobseter, steak,and profiteroles) and another bottle of wine, and coffee, and ended up spending a bastard fortune.
Then we strolled down to the steps of Sacre Couer, which has got a fabulous view of Paris, listened to a couple of students singing and playing the accordion, then strolled down the hill back to Pigalle for a look round the area, which consists of sex shops, peep show shops , and some of the tastiest birds I have seen, sitting in the windows of the hostess bars
Back at the hotel room,a t about 1am (thats nearly 24 hours awake), we decided to finish off the bottle of wine (as you do) where upon the completley shagged out Mrs Dog collapsed into a heap in her blanket, forcing me to quaff the lions share of the aforementioned bottle of plonk…..
To be continued…..if you’re interested!

The Return of the Wanderer

  Hello Folks , I’m back.
Sorry its taken soooo long to update this blog but it has been like a madhouse both at work and at home, so I haven’t had much of a chance to write anything.
I will place further entries later m’lud when I get back home to Dog Towers after work with tales of ribald partying in Paris…. well almost… well not at all in fact, but more later.
Oh , just one more thing
 Bye bye to:
Sunderland  more about them later
West Bromwich Albion
Goodbye goodbye goodbye!
back to the depths of Hades from which you emerged. It was good while it lasted , but thanks to you once more.
Every day in every way, Birmingham City do their best to cheer you up.
Thanks for yet another glorious campaign.!
Back soon gang……thats me by the way ,  not the Blues.. hopefully!